Affirmations for a Boss Momma and Her Struggles

It’s not doubt in my mind that being a mother is hard. My son is almost two and I’ve been tested more than once. It’s taken time to learn the right level of patience with a wild soul of a child. My son is hyper active and some how- has endless energy to destroy.

One thing no one told motherhood would be filled with so much trial and error, sadness, and frustration. In the first year of my son’s life I isolated myself and shut myself in my home. No one checked up on me, and no one asked to see me nor my son.

I felt alone, and there was endless chores and messes- even to this day I constantly have a sink full of dishes, unkeep hair, hand prints all of my walls and lap, and undone laundry. Balancing his needs, my house needs, my work and clients has been the bane of my existence and sometimes I wish I never had to sleep so I could at least 20 minutes to myself.

Someone always thinks they have the answer to your issues, and people who have never been a mother or parent will give you advice that is just so beyond irrelevant and impossible to follow that you think one of these days you’re just going to plan explode. 

I’ve been there, and some days, I still am. My son is only almost two and the worse hasn’t even came yet. This article isn’t to say I’m perfect and I have all the answers- because truthfully I am still there with you- I’m still frusated most days, and most days I’m so exhausted. Hey- some days I ignore chores because sometimes I just can’t muster the energy or motivation to do it.

But I’ve found that these affirmations help me stay balanced, focused, and centered.

“I have the ability to stay patient through out the day”

“I give myself permission to relax and take things as the go”

“I have the innate wisdom to take care of my child and myself today.”

“Today is a new day, and brings new blessings”

Where Did The Bees Go? Story Time
Psychic? Medium? FAQ
How I Manifested A New Deck

Advertisements

How I Changed My Life- For the Best

For people who know me, they can testify for me about what a large life transformation I’ve gone through the last two years. I am much healthier, much happier, and so much more balanced. It’s taken me a really long time since getting clean to really detox from the addict mindset.

Even with being clean there was still that tricky, I-Am-More-Clever-Than-You attidude I had, which had a deadly mixture with all avoidance of the fact that I was in fact an addict.

After I quit- I thought that was the freeing card. No more work- what a fool was I ! Yes- that is right, my mind set was once I was clean it would all slowly fall into place.

So wrong- so totally freaking wrong.

It took me almost 6 long years to learn that if the change I wanted was to come- it was going to have to be achieved through my own sweat, blood, and tears.

So how did I change my life? I accepted I had fucked up- yes I fucked up. And to be honest- I was still messing up pretty bad.

When I finally did that- I was able to look into the mirror and really, really examine my choices and behaviors. And what struck me was: Even though I wasn’t using, I was still acting like an active addict.

It was now time to release all of those behaviors and self defeating thoughts I let clutter my life.

And that is what changed my life. Taking a real close look at myself in the mirror and not liking who I still was.

When You Miss A Call, The Universe Screams

I can’t tell you how many times the Universe has grabbed me by my shirt and said, “You’re going to start listening to me or I’m going to get mean.” Ah yes, there have been times when we have thought about how cruel of a mistress our universe can be, sometimes it’s down right nasty and unfair.

But think about it, when someone doesn’t listen to your advice or warnings don’t you get a little pissy? The Universe and the Divine are close to that, a force that sometimes has to get a little pushy for use to start listening.

The Universe is always sending us messages once we open up to it- but these bad boys can often be a little scripted and unclear. There have been many times that the Universe has been like, ” Look, Alexis this is a bad idea stop it.” and after I ignore it- BAM. Hits me harder than it ever had before.

 

Though, how do you know whats a message? Oddly placed things, or when you have two choices, the one your heart and gut tells you to choose is the one you should always pick. We notice them, but we brush them off. Stop brushing off those “”coincidences”” and start seeing those god instances. Nothing is a mistake, and everything has a meaning.

Recently, a good friend of mind suffered a great loss- her husband had died. Her phone started acting odd- playing her husband’s pandora list. She figure out why, and her phone kept glitching, bringing up music she hadn’t listened to on her youtube recents.

When she was on her way to my house- it happened one more time: but to someone who code decode the message. Her husband’s spirit had been trying to contact her and when she pulled down my road she realized: it was HIS recently played music. All of the music had meaning; it told her a story, a story of their relationship.

It wasn’t a mistake. It wasn’t a glitch- it was the work of a collaboration of the Universe and her husband: both telling her that it’s not her fault, he isn’t mad, and it’s time to fulfill her life’s purpose- which she was putting off because of him.

The Beginning of A Spiritual Life Pt. 4

One of the hardest parts of spirituality is being told by others what you should and shouldn’t be doing. For me, I’ve been constantly bombarded by the idea that I should be some zen, cookie cutter, ball of sunshine. To simply say- that will never be me. I am an Aries Sun Sign and a Virgo Moon Sign- does that spell for shimmering sunshine? No.I am angry, I am a perfectionist, and I am beyond intense. That I’m-So-Hippie-Boho-Let’s-Be-Friends persona most people have in the Spiritual Community will never fit me. And if someone TRIES to push me into that box, I will kick and scream like a toddler at nap time.

Why? Because Spirituality is about learning about yourself, feeling comfortable as yourself, and connecting with the Divine Universe. This doesn’t mean I am closed off- maybe one day I’ll get to the point of that. But creating a fake persona would be me feeding into my own ego of wanting to be an idea versus a person. When it’s brought up to me about this Hippie persona is how I should act I scoff, it’s completely scoff-able that someone is projecting this onto me.

These personas take a couple things from us: Raw, powerful, unimaginable emotions. This persona takes me REAL emotions from me. Its normal to be sad, natural to be mad, human to grieve. That is the point of this journey- to re-connect with our souls. Blocking off our emotions is blocking ourselves off from our soul.

Letting someone preach this to you can be dangerous. People who are newly connecting with themselves need to learn how to be raw and real with themselves. That is the time to open up to the world and seas inside of yourself- perfecting the balance should only come later.

The Day of a Spiritual Momma

If you don’t know, I’m a young mother to a beautiful little boy who recently turned one. When my journey began I hadn’t ever thought a child was apart of my plan, especially at the age of 18. But he is a blessing, a light in my life that wasn’t expected. My experience with the divine and sacred motherhood was healing, uplifting, and powers me. It is powerful, and their is no bond, no understanding like the one between child and mother.

But days can be long and hard- sometimes I am faced with emotional blocks and physical fatigue that I’ve never knew could be possible.

5 am: Wake up- my breakfast for husband and his lunch, start coffee, drink water.

5:45 am: Yoga to soft music.

6:20 am: Read clients and/or work on blog posts and/or newsletter

7:30: Make morning smoothie, make son’s breakfast, wake son up.

8:00: Spend time with son, reply to emails and messages as they come in.

11:00: Feed son, put him down for nap time, make myself another meal, drink water, spend time in reflecting. Fit clients in as needed.

12:00-3:00: teach my son, play games, nurture him.

3:20: Greet husband, watch them play and interact, make wholesome dinner. Celebrate and talk about our days together.

4:00 Shower, cleanse myself, take time to reflect again. Through out my day I try to reflect and consider things- afterwards I fit replies and emails in.

7:00: Bedtime. This can sometimes take awhile since we do not believe in CIO. After this I relax, and reconnect with my husband and attend to  more business.

Indigo Children: The Truth

As a member of the Spiritual Community the term Indigo Child is one of the most known and used openly. You’ll see it a lot, “Known Indigo Child” or “My child the Indigo baby!” They are celebrated and boosted as a trophy. But in reality- what IS this? What the REAL story?

My issue with the articles floating around is that they don’t really explain much. All it is most of the time is an article listing personality traits and diet habits. I mean really- it’s the same recycled piece over and over. Most of the time is is the same list and format.

If you don’t know where the term comes from then Google: Nancy Ann Tappe. She’s a parapsychology writer. If you’re into this type of literature that’s AWESOME, just bypass the negativity of harsh critics.

Indigo children are also closely related to Crystal Children and Star Children. Often they are all lumped together and treated like they’re the same thing. They’re not. Indigo children are less developed- while they have natural powers and can come into it- they tend to almost never really tap into them fully.

They are also prone to being seen as bratty, self center- though this is partly because they aren’t understood. They are the beginning of a change- thus they are a work in progress. They have a the need for room, the need to be heard and understood, and the need to be respected. Sadly though, because they are a middle ground for change they are not fully ready to: A) accept or understand why B) to be accepted or understood. These were and are the pioneers- the ones to start ASKING for these things.

These types of people are the beginning of no longer keeping negative relationships- this is often seen as selfish due to them often distancing themselves from parents. Conservative ideas tend to not accept this as reasonable: this is seen as being none thankful towards family “”effort””. They see through abusive behaviors that are paraded as good gestures, they know and can sense the true meaning of behaviors.

Indigo children want to break down old structures that are no longer working- thus they are seen as trouble makers too. ‘Don’t fix what isn’t broken,” well, they know it’s broken and isn’t working for everyone. These power structures in our society- they know it’s only fitted to the little and not the majority.

They demand a change and that scares a lot of people.

Beginning of a Spiritual Life Pt. 3

Part of my own spiritual adventure was recovering from traumas. I went through a lot of therapy and counseling as a child- still with that I struggled to really observe, process, and heal from it. There was still some sort of anger, remorse, self-blame, and most importantly: I didn’t understand why. Why was the biggest issue.

You’ll never hear me say: “Rape is God’s plan!” or “God throws the hard balls to those he think can handle it!”

Because that isn’t true- but spirituality helped me understand that I could come back from it. It helped me understand that there was nothing I could do but move forward, because it did not defeat me. I DID nothing. I DIDN’T deserve it. Most importantly, I could channel my energy into something more productive.

During my Theories of Chemical Dependency and Abuse class in college there was a Chapter called: The mixing puzzle piece. The Chapter reviewed the lacking element in any Recovery from a controlled substance: the health of the spiritual side. I think it may be a very important piece of recovery, people who are recovering need a lot of healing, a lot of balancing, and need to focus on staying and being grounded.

Spirituality is all about giving what you get, and understanding the give and take behavior of the Universe. Especially with someone recovering from drugs- understanding the idea that feeding into negativity only breeds more negativity is vital to moving forward. While yes, therapy teaches, I feel as though when you BELIEVE in these word, these idea, these boundaries it makes for a more divine, and profound recovery.

Beginning my spiritual path meant one thing for me: finally surrendering that I was not always in control and that it is okay to not always be in control.